The Mother

 

I was the sole caregiver for my mother for 10 years.  Around year 9, she would frequently have dark periods when she’d say, “What will we do when you can no longer care for me?” - anticipating further issues beyond my ability to manage….. and when I made a plan to move her to be near a sibling and his children, in a state with much lower cost assisted living and beyond, she became bitter and accused me of kicking her out.  She never forgave me.  

I remember going to PT for myself during those years, for extreme lower back and right leg pain, and just breaking out into inconsolable tears that would not stop, for reasons I could not articulate - caregiver burnout?  There’s a lot more to the story, but I’ll just leave it here.